Author Topic: 13 reasons why  (Read 328 times)

Timinator

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13 reasons why
« on: April 26, 2017, 05:16:16 PM »
Anyone else watching/watched? I'm part why in episode 3 and want to keep watching. I know it gets rough later

Timinator

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Re: 13 reasons why
« Reply #1 on: May 04, 2017, 03:32:44 AM »
Well I got to the end, found it quite gripping and wanted to see how it ended.  I'm glad they had the controversial bits in there.  Sure they could have done certain things better, or explained alternative options. 

Its got people talking about a taboo thing where the don't talk about it version just doesn't work.

Sssith

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Re: 13 reasons why
« Reply #2 on: May 05, 2017, 02:51:22 PM »
I might end up watching this if my daughter does.

By all accounts it glorifies suicide, which is not good.  Supposed to be an interesting story, and teens are watching it droves. 

Timinator

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Re: 13 reasons why
« Reply #3 on: May 05, 2017, 08:17:51 PM »
By all accounts?  Nope, not at all.  By many accounts you may have read, sure.   Many others applaude it.  Also think about all the other movies/tv shows you've seen that have a suicide, or attempted suicide in it, but the main part of the show is something else.  Eg the attempted suicide in Heat where Al Pacino's character happens to come in and save the day.  This is just a whole show where everything is either leading up to it, or stuff discussing what happens after.

The particular scene was very difficult to watch, they actually had a different method than in the book. You knew it was coming but there is no soppy music, its just very raw and awful.  They

Glorifying suicide definitely isn't good.  I don't think it does this.  Others think its all about revenge, that is a simple way of viewing things.

As you say a very interesting story.

Over here they made up a whole new censorship rating.  Those under 18 can watch it, but with parental guidance at the time.  They didn't want to say "if you are under X you can't see it".  The messages are relevant for boys as well as girls.

I know some parents who are watching it first, then they will decide if they want their kids to see it.

nanenj

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Re: 13 reasons why
« Reply #4 on: May 06, 2017, 06:56:55 PM »
I've only watched that scene.

It is beautifully done.  I do not know the context, nor reasons, nor anything else about the show.

The hype about that scene is all I'm aware of.

My opinions on this topic are not healthy for public discourse though, so I'll keep everything else out of the spotlight.

TheMikrobe

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Re: 13 reasons why
« Reply #5 on: May 09, 2017, 02:00:03 AM »
Haven't seen this and not particularly interested in doing so, but I found this interesting: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/may/08/13-reasons-why-devoured-teenagers-understand-why
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Sssith

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Re: 13 reasons why
« Reply #6 on: May 10, 2017, 12:49:31 PM »
From a guidance councilor at a private London (high) school:

Quote
Dear Parents and Guardians of Grade 7-12 students,


As you may be aware, some of our students are watching, or know about, the popular Netflix show 13 Reasons Why.  Some of the themes explored in the program are real in the lives of our teens today and are important topics to talk about and debrief.  It is significant that the students are watching this and we have some concerns and some suggestions about responding to the program.


We think that 13 Reasons Why realistically portrays many of the struggles that teens face today, including online harassment, loneliness, objectification, bullying, and sexual assault.  The show also stresses the importance of being kind to one another and the impact that a small, one-off comment can have on a person.  It also underscores the importance of having a trusted adult in the lives of every young person.


There is much we do throughout the school to address the causes of suicidal thinking. A part of this effort includes classes and discussion about media literacy. Therefore, we believe it’s important to carefully consider responses to this program and the conversations it engenders, both at school and at home.


The concerns about the show are being widely discussed in various media outlets and they are the same concerns we had while watching the show.  They are:


1.    The romanticisation of suicide and the creation of an elaborate suicide note that has a revenge-like quality to it may be appealing to students who are already looking for a “way out” or who have contemplated suicide.


2.    Adults, including parents, teachers, and a counselor in the show do not respond effectively when the main character is in a crisis.  The counselor does not have adequate training and is not a mental health professional.  Our students need to have faith that their teachers and counselors will respond effectively and that the show does not reflect normal adult responses.


3.    There is an extremely graphic scene of the main character killing herself by slitting her wrists.  This can be traumatizing for anyone, especially for teens who are already in a vulnerable position.  Although it's impossible to make someone depressed and suicidal simply by talking about it, close proximity to suicide can encourage the phenomenon of copycat behavior in students who are already suicidal and looking for a "way out."


4.    Finally, when learning about depression, sexual assault, and suicide, it is important that students have a way to debrief these heavy topics with adults in their life.  While most of our students have watched the show in isolation and talked to each other about it, they have not talked about it with a trusted adult.  In our experience, we have found that teens are willing and able to do so.  In fact, many of them have some of the same concerns about the program we have listed above.


If you are a parent, we highly recommend asking your child if they have seen the program, and if they have, watching a portion of the show and reading the talking points provided by the JED Foundation<https://www.jedfoundation.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/13RW-Talking-Points-JED-SAVE-Netflix.pdf>. Following this, look for opportunities to talk about the show with your child.


As a parent, it is important to know that you can always ask your teen if they’ve ever thought of taking their own life. It is also important to recognize some of the warning signs and red flags of suicidal thinking so you can get your child the help they need.  Here are some of the most common red flags:


·        changes in personal hygiene - not showering, not changing clothes or not caring about personal appearance,


·        depressed, anxious, or irritable moods,


·        sleeping for many hours and still feeling fatigued,


·        tearfulness,


·        a loss of interest in usual activities and hobbies,


·        withdrawing from family and friends,


·        loss of appetite or overeating,


·        difficulties with concentration, memory, and making decisions,


·        a drop in school performance,


·        missing school often because of stomach ache, headaches or “not feeling well”,


·        feelings and/or expressions of hopelessness such as, “Things will never get better,” “I wish I were dead,”  and “I’ve let everyone down!”


If you want to learn more about teenage depression, you can do so here<https://www.jedfoundation.org/depression/>.


Depression is a mental illness that is temporary and can be treated successfully.  Suicide is permanent.


The two most common myths about suicide are:


If a person talks about it they won't do it.  This is not true.  If a person is talking about it, they want your help and they want you to know. It’s important to always treat these conversations as the “cry for help” they are, even if the person turns out not to be suicidal.

By asking about suicide you will introduce it into their minds.  This is also not true.  Asking about suicide and talking about it are the most important things you can do. As parents, it is always okay to ask your child if they've ever thought of suicide.  Sometimes as a parent you will hear about your child’s friends and develop concerns about them.  It is always appropriate to notify us in this case so we can get that child the help they need.


For an introductory video on this topic click here.<https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fTeTt7o0Re8>

As a school, we prioritize the health and safety of the students.  Research shows that when teens are struggling, they are much more likely to go to a friend than to an adult.  Therefore, it is essential we teach children help seeking skills.


In 7th and 8th grade health classes, advisories and the Natural Helpers program, we address how to support ourselves and each other socially and emotionally and how to intervene if concerned about a friend, including turning to a trusted adult. Parents, students and teachers can speak directly with the 7th and 8th grade counselor in W-313 or via email at kelley_reid@asl.org<mailto:kelley_reid@asl.org>.


In the High School, freshmen will be talking about depression and getting help for themselves or a friend for the next two weeks in advisories.  Also, sophomores receive training on recognizing the signs and symptoms of suicide and how to get help.  We have a trained group of peer counselors in the high school who help with the mental health and well-being of the student body.  Parents, students and teachers can speak directly with the High School Counselor in O-343 or via email at stephanie_oliver@asl.org<mailto:stephanie_oliver@asl.org>.


We are full-time middle and high counselors trained and experienced around the issues seen in 13 Reasons Why including isolation, depression, and sexual assault. Students can always approach us directly in our offices or via e-mail.  We are also available to talk in person or on the phone if you ever have any concerns about a child.

Timinator

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Re: 13 reasons why
« Reply #7 on: May 10, 2017, 04:00:52 PM »
Some very good points there, especially this "We think that 13 Reasons Why realistically portrays many of the struggles that teens face today, including online harassment, loneliness, objectification, bullying, and sexual assault.  The show also stresses the importance of being kind to one another and the impact that a small, one-off comment can have on a person.  It also underscores the importance of having a trusted adult in the lives of every young person."

My sister in law started watching it as her teenager might watch it one day.  Then when my sister in law is on episode 5, she finds out her daughter has already seen the whole things at a friends place :P